Mental Affirmation to Take Home

Long time no see my Chimera family! It's been quite the wild ride for me. Since returning back to Southern California for my 5th year in college, I've been hustling back-to-back with projects and midterms combining into a mesh that I'm sorting out. I know I've been not as active as I've wanted to be on here. Since the launch of my website, I was hoping to start many new opportunities that I've been brainstorming to quite some time. The reality is, in order for me to jump to that part of life, I need to get through the number one necessity here for myself. School. Since it's been quite some time since I've last written here for you all, I just wanted to ask a simple question.

How are you?

It's a simple question with a lot of different type of answers. Some of us are unaware of the power the question, "How are you?" means. To some, it can be a simple "I'm doing fine." To others, it can really change how they feel throughout the day. Some of us when we are asked how we're doing, it makes us feel like our emotions are valid. Although that can be the case for some, not everyone will feel the exact same way. Many of us, including myself, can feel overwhelmed with life very easily. It comes to the point where the term "How are you?" isn't going to be enough anymore. Sad truth, but it's a reality.

How am I?

As a fifth year in college, I've pretty much gotten to the point in life where I feel like I've had enough of the experience and joy that the fun side of college has given me for the past 2 1/2 years (*excluding covid). I have the stories that I will cherish and remember forever, whether it was good or bad. Currently, I am at the point where I'm just focusing on myself and the future of what I can do. Although I can see myself aging from the decrease of going out/spending more time by myself, I've chosen to cherish it rather than fighting it off. You know when I look at the year 23, it's not a bad number. If there's anything that 23 has taught me so far, it's to enjoy the simplistic things like writing this post for you all, or creating weekly mental affirmations for myself. You know your definitely aging when the highlight of your days is laughing at TikTok videos of British Shorthair cats. I can sense the judgement out there, but it's a guilty pleasure. *sigh*

Checking my mentality

You know, being a college student is one thing. Being a college student studying engineering is another story. It's a crazy hike to get to your final destination. The amount of late night hours studying/doing homework. Putting the effort to make connections in class to succeed and barely keep your head above water. I look back at these past 4 years and ask myself, how did I do it? Honestly, I don't have a simple answer for that. I can't say the past 4 years were easy. If there's one major thing I've had to learn by myself, it was to remind myself to make room to check on my mentality. The first three years were rough. Doing something like that was a completely new environment for me. I've had to experiment and try new things when it never worked out. I can't say that I'm completely aware of what to do right now, because I'm still in the learning phase. What I can say is, where I was 4 years ago, it a completely different mindset to where I am now. Where I was 10 years ago is a complete 180 of who I am today. During the month of 2020, I've taken the time to really recap myself, and close some doors in my life that I've left open way too long. Although new doors opened along the way, the ones that remained open for far too long were chapters in my life that I'm glad is over. Certain things in life that were toxic or far out of reach for me to fix were no longer my problem to dealt with. I'm at the phase where if something in life cannot be fixed nor worth working out, just close that door. It's exhausting man! There's too many stories that I've had to close the door on. And there are many doors along the way that I will have to close eventually.... Ask yourself:

What doors do you still need to close?

To those who are reading this and are maybe about to start college or are already in their first year, just to let you know, this passage is not to intimidate you about what could possibly be your obstacle in life. In fully honestly, everyone has a different story in how they grow. The story of growing is a complicated one to answer, because it comes in many different factors and stories of ways we get to our specific point in life. It's a story of trial and error. Regrets and accomplishments. Ones that we try to figure out and may look like a fool at first. Therefore, my last passage was a sample of one story that was given. I don't how your story may go, your "chimera", but I will say this, your choices of where you want to go in life is made right now. Choose wisely.

It's okay to be upset of your downfall

If there's one thing that I've truly hated as a kid, and hate till this day, it's confronting my failures. To generalize it for you, it sucks. We get to this point in life where you feel like you need to be the adult in the room right now. Knowing what you want in life, and how you're going to reach there. Once you realize that everything is not turning out the way you hoped for, you feel like a complete mess. My life has always been about trying to get my goals, and making sure it works out the way I wanted to. If there's one trip that college has taught me. It's to be really flexible with your chimeras. Sometimes on the road you drive, you will have a take a detour around to get to your goal. It may not be pleasant most of the time, but flexibility is something you gain out of. How many more detours my life will give? I don't know. But what I do know is, I have to understand why it could happen? For some reason, there's this mindset of people looking down on your sad side. Yes, the emotions suck, and it's messy at times. But there's this niche that reminds me of understanding my mentality balance. The fact that I may be sad at something can show that I care about it. Or, it can show that I have a vulnerability or understanding for something that is expressed through a tear jerking or low moment. It's normal for us all to have these emotions at times, and it should never be frowned upon. Rather than hating yourself for being upset, at least understand where you're coming from. Ask yourself that:

What I'm feeling is validated

With that being said, I hope we all walk away with something to grasp onto for life. I don't know where life will lead me in the future, but whatever obstacle I might have to take, I am hopefully ready to face it. Before I head off to get back to these assignments, let me leave you off with some nice cute mental affirmations that you get to keep for yourself. Hope you enjoy and wish you the best!